How Should a Christian Respond to Bad Language?

(Note: This article was written for and published by The Gospel Coalition. It was later posted on the Coram Deo blog.)

I’ve worked a number of “blue collar” jobs over the years (landscaping, construction, security, to be specific). On each jobsite, I found that my coworkers frequently used profane, sexist, and racist language in their humor and everyday conversation. Should a Christian respond negatively to every instance of this kind of behavior? How can a Christian balance between camouflaging their faith and just being a prude?

I can identify with what you are going through.  I have worked in some of these manual labor jobs myself over the years and served in the Army for over 20 years.  You are right, there does tend to be a number of folks who use the kind of language that might make some of us squirm.

There are a number of practical suggestions based on some of my own life experiences that I could offer as a way that we as Christ-followers can deal with these situations when they come up.  However, I do want to begin with seeing what Scripture might have to say about dealing with the sins we see so frequently demonstrated around us every day.  We want to look at these situations through a biblical lens so that we can respond to these thorns and thistles in the work environment in a way that might bring glory to God, who placed us in our jobs for His purposes.

Sinners sin

The place to start might be to review what God’s Word has to say about sin in general.  Men and women were made in God’s image (Gen. 1:26-27).  However, Adam and Eve rebelled (Gen. 3).  This has impacts on our daily work (Gen. 3:16-19).  From that point forward, children were still born with God’s image, but they also had the image of their human parents.  (See Gen. 5:3).

These are basic theological truths that most Christians understand well.  But how can we apply this knowledge in trying to properly respond to those who blatantly sin at work and elsewhere?

When I was in my last year of college, my father was about to get married to a woman he had had an affair with.  I went to my pastor for some counseling regarding how to treat my new stepmother.  He gave me some wise advice on how to love others in spite of their sinfulness.  He said something like, “Dogs bark, trees shed their leaves in the fall, and sinners sin.  It’s just what they do.  It shouldn’t surprise us when we see it”.  He then reminded me that she was one more person I had the opportunity to show God’s love. 

So, how should I respond when we hear sinful words in the workplace? We should not be surprised by it. Plus, it just may give us an opportunity to to show God’s love to those who need it.

Choose your battles

So, in answer to your question, no, I do not think a Christian should respond negatively to every instance of this kind of behavior.  Perhaps knowing what we just discussed might help us when others sin verbally in our presence.  We should not be surprised when we hear words that take the Lord’s name in vain or disrespect others.  However, that does not mean that we stay silent and allow it to continue indefinitely.  Jesus took us out of the world to send us right back into the world as salt and light, to make a difference right where we are.  (See John 17:14-19.)

I think we have to have some practical wisdom here when we consider how to confront someone over their choice of language.  There are two major questions we need to ask to determine our approach: 1) How damaging are the words that are used? 2) Is this coworker a Christian?

I remember basic training.  I had a drill sergeant who constantly used F-bombs and other colorful language in every sentence.  I became numb to it.  Although I actively discourage the use of it in my current position with the soldiers that work directly for me, there is not much I can do to diminish its use in others.  Sadly, it has become part of the military culture.  When I weigh the actual damage that occurs when those kinds of words are said, the effects truly are minimal.

However, when co-workers use words that are disrespectful to other people of different cultures or are denigrating to women, I have to draw the line.  A workplace that allows that kind of talk that takes away the dignity of other human beings and creates a hostile environment for all needs to change.  Perhaps God has placed you in this place for such a time as this.  (See Esther 4:14.)  We do need to take a stand.  The conversation must start with a loving and private conversation with the offender.  If they refuse to listen, perhaps you take it higher, or wait to see if it changes.

Not only do we need to pause and think before we try to wrestle inappropriate speech to the ground, but we also need to take a step back to assess whether or not the offensive speaker is a believer or not.  If they are not a Christian, telling them to “clean up their act” will not bring them closer to faith in Christ.  If they are a brother or sister in Christ, then we have a leg to stand on when we approach them to try to get them to be mindful of the impact of their words.  When we do care enough to confront someone, we always need to remember to look at ourselves first.

I hope that this snapshot of biblical truth and practical wisdom will give you a firmer foundation to stand on the next time you hear something negative coming out of coworkers mouths.

About the author:

Russell E. Gehrlein (Master Sergeant, U.S. Army, Retired) is a Christian, husband of 39 years, father of three, grandfather of four, and author of Immanuel Labor – God’s Presence in our Profession: A Biblical, Theological, and Practical Approach to the Doctrine of Work, published by WestBow Press in February 2018. He is an ordinary man who is passionate about helping other ordinary people experience God’s presence and integrate their Christian faith at work. He received a B.S. in Mathematics from Colorado State University in 1980 and an M.A. in Biblical Studies from Grand Rapids Theological Seminary in 2015.  He is a former junior/senior high school math and science teacher and youth pastor. After serving 20 years on active duty, Russ now works as a Department of the Army civilian at Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri.  More than 50 articles posted on this blog have been published 100 times on numerous Christian organization’s websites, including: the Center for Faith & Work at LeTourneau University, Institute for Faith, Work & Economics, Coram Deo, Nashville Institute for Faith + Work, Made to Flourish, 4Word Women, Acton Institute, and The Gospel Coalition.